maybe i'm autistic in some ways. like i can't easily adapt when i need to let go of somethings, that i throw temper tantrums when something is removed from me or taken away. i can't decide on what songs to delete in my mp3 to make room for other songs, that sometimes, i end up not deleting any and just saving up to buy an mp3 with a bigger storage. i can't delete some text messages even if its just an 'Okay.' or a greeting or something that doesn't even make sense to me. I can't throw away pieces of paper with writings or drawings on it even if its already torn in two or the writings are blurred and smudged.
what's worse is that, when i love someone, it might seem to others, even myself that i have gotten over that someone but then some things would happen that would cause a great disturbance on my belief that i have moved on and it would prove me otherwise. what's WORST is that, now that i'm saying it all out, i am making it more...concrete, more real that it becomes truly...true!
it was better when i kept my mouth shut about my emotions and feelings that somehow it was easier to ignore, but, well, you know me.
well, i don't want to whine all throughout this blog. some happenings have been good for me. after all, its all mindset, baby!
so, i'm trying to learn this one lesson in life: To Let Go, to make room for what's coming.
i'm now ready for new things, i've made some spaces in my heart and my pocket.
xoxo, Toletski
No comments:
Post a Comment