when reality comes knocking...it comes with a bang!

For this summer, my goals are as follows:
* loose weight
* land a job
* to be united with my whole being

Unfortunately, only one of these three was accomplished. That is, to land a job. But, then, the stint only lasted for a month. Anyway, I was only planning to work for this summer because I didn't know yet of our class schedule and I don't want to bite more than I could chew. So, there goes the 1-month job as a Sales Representative somewhere in Ortigas.

Now that I know of our class schedule and that I can still work while studying, I decided to, again, apply. Today, I've spent an entire day waiting for my name to be called. And it was called, they informed me that I've passed the exams and all and the last step is the final interview. The lady who conducted my interview said I still have a lot to improve on particularly my consonants.

That was Reality's cue to come knocking.

Belonging to a family, that neighbors and other relatives look up to, imbued a certain confidence (and arrogance) in my subconscious self that I am unaware of until that moment when the lady enumerated the errors she caught.

Whenever people throw praises at me, I tend to disregard them in a lame and effortless attempt to keep my feet on the ground.
So, while I was sitting in that interview room, I was so lax that my words came out like a lazy purr creating the impression that I have problems with my words. ( See? Even now, I am trying to make an excuse why my words came out that way! What an arrogant son of a b%$#ch!) When the lady told me that she cannot say yes to my application, there was like a voice in my head, laughing. Don't get me wrong. I'm not crazy or anything, but it was laughing, mocking me for being so confident. That's when I've realized that I wasn't great enough to act like that in an interview. I can't put it to words but it was like an epiphany.
Maybe my arrogance would go away if I declare it to the world. So here goes,

"I am arrogant! I can't do anything right. Well, I might've done some right stuff. But still, I am arrogant. I have no right to think that I am superior to anyone or anything. From now on, I promise to be good and truly humble with all my heart and soul."

You're supposed to say this, reader:

"Amen to that!"

It's optional.:) have a nice day!